Review of Phantasm

Phantasm (1979)
1/10
What has been going on in the last 90 minutes????
6 June 1999
Oh my God! Oh my God! Please someone try to explain to me what sort of crap this is. Everything in this flick shows its ridiculously low budget and its scarce use of art. Here are some of my comments on the so-called "classic tale of terror":

  • the story is impossible to follow: you get people getting killed and reappearing again later, unhurt, while others remain alive throughout and then, toward the end, you get a glimpse of their grave. Apart from that you get people being here and there, not understanding how they got there, how they got in etc.


  • the main character, Mike, seems to be in a desperate need of a speech therapist;


  • no one can really act (except Reggie Bannister)


  • nothing really makes sense, except those spicy brain-chewing flying balls


  • the Tall Man with his continuous, ever-monotonous "Boy!" is more pathetic than scary


One last note, I did not realise when it was time to start getting frightened - it is all so awfully junky. If you get scared to death by this one, (the motto says "If this doesn't scare you, you're already dead!) you've got serious problems. If this is as scary as you can get, then normal everyday life is a farce!
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