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Reviews
Jurassic World (2015)
Dinos return to glory days
JURASSIC WORLD I do so love when a movie series returns to its creative roots. JURASSIC PARK was an epic film, and then Spielberg and company found a way to destroy its flavor with two banal sequels. After a lengthy hiatus that included much soul-searching, and dumping Jack Horner, JURASSIC WORLD brings the franchise back to the wonderfulness of the original.
I try to not watch trailers before I see a movie. Often, they are misleading. At best, the reveal too many key plot elements or scenes. Unfortunately, the trailers for JURASSIC WORLD permeated media in a major advertising campaign blitz. What I saw in the trailers alarmed me. Did I actually see Velociraptors work along side the film's protagonist Chris Pratt, as a unified force? It reminded me of ALIENS VS. PREDATOR, where viewers were force-fed the notion a petite black woman was the only human representative capable of defeating a horde of aliens by teaming with the creatures who hunt humans for sport. Please. The concept was idiotic, and though they tried to salvage the movie series with a follow-up, the initial theme essentially destroyed the franchise in the world of celluloid.
The raptors, in the same frame with Pratt, are not friendly creatures. Luckily, there are no "we are family" moments between species. I'll test your memory here, but think back to the second film in the CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON series; THE REVENGE OF THE CREATURE. In the film, John Agar, experimenting on the intelligence of the gill-man, uses an electric prod to teach the word "stop" to the Creature. Through Pavlovian testing, the Creature hesitates at the sound. It establishes a necessary reaction for the climatic scene. The raptors work much the same manner in JURASSIC WORLD. It is done well.
Now, consider Jack Horner. After JURASSIC PARK, Horner attempted to garner his fifteen minutes of Andy Warhol fame and used rather sketchy paleontology findings to discredit the Tyrannosaurus Rex. He claimed the King of Dinosaurs was nothing but a mooching scavenger. Somehow, he convinced Spielberg to shift attention away from Rex. It was a bad move that culminated in a horrendous JURASSIC PARK 3, where a Spinosaurus, which in reality measured only 20 feet compared to T-rex's 50 feet, fights and defeats Rex. Horner's new Rex theories were dismantled by his peers and colleagues within a year. He is now in the café of scientific oblivion, sipping coffee with the two researchers who tried to convince us of global warming with a fabricated hockey stick graph model. Rex is back in full glory in JURASSIC WORLD. In fact, he received cheers and applause from the preview audience when he appeared on screen. They were louder than any reaction to superheroes.
JURASSIC WORLD makes many references to the original, and basically ignores everything from the sequels. It is twenty years past John Hammond's disastrous attempt to bring dinosaurs to a theme park. In that time, technology has improved, enabling Hammond's dream to become reality. Thousands of people visit JURASSIC WORLD on a regular basis, but as with all things, dinosaurs become mundane with the public and the park must find new and exciting ways to keep ticket sales booming. Enter Indominus Rex, a genetically built dinosaur hybrid, meant to add an element of fear and terror to park visitors. BD Wong returns as Dr. Henry Wu, and is the culprit behind creation of the new Rex. He is reminiscent of Dr. Susan McCallister, played by Saffron Burrows, in DEEP BLUE SEA, who created superior sharks, but opted not to tell anyone about the enhances features.
In keeping with the Spielberg tradition of constantly putting children in danger, Ty Simpkins and Nick Robinson star as Gray and Zach, who are visiting the park while their parents attempt to end their marital bliss. There can never be happy families anymore in films. It doesn't fit the template of a dysfunctional society, so loved by liberal Hollywood ideology. Entrusted to the care of their aunt, the boys naturally find a way to immerse themselves in park havoc, while they discover the bond that exists between brothers. Meanwhile, Auntie Claire, played by Bryce Dallas Howard, while chasing the All American Woman Executive Dream, has the hots for Owen (Pratt), who is in this story what Robert Muldoon should have been in the first. All these subplots are secondary and just provide hurdles for a tale about a genetic freak, and the dinosaurs who hate him.
Critics were able to see JURASSIC WORLD in 3D. It is worth it. The dinos, especially the raptor attacks, are superb. The dinos look great, thanks to Ed Verreaux's production design. Cinematography by John Schwartzman is excellent and provides several iconic moments sure to appear on posters and memes. Music, though featuring additional tunes by Michael Giacchino is basically variations on John Williams memorable score.
All in all, JURASSIC WORLD brings the series back to where it belongs. You can watch the first one, skip the second and third, and jump straight to this one and have a better franchise. The movie is filled with dinosaurs and dinosaur action. It's worth repeated views and deserves a spot on your home video shelf. As such, it exemplifies excellence in film entertainment and captures the coveted Fist of Fiore Award for 2015. You'll like this one; it's a keeper.
10/10
The Man with the Iron Fists 2 (2015)
Sequel lacks stars, action of first
When THE MAN WITH THE IRON FISTS was first released, I think I was one of the few critics in the nation who gave it a favorable nod. While it was a glitzy martial arts affair, it did boast a few rather impressive fight scenes and a bevy of heavyweight stars including Dave Bautista; Russell Crowe; Rick Yune and Lucy Liu.
THE MAN WITH THE IRON FISTS 2 lacks all of that. The stars have bolted, with RZA the only hold over from the first. The fight scenes are good, but not spectacular, and the story is culled from the plot lines of many of the original martial arts films that inundated the Silver Screen in the 1970's.
Thaddeus Henry Smith (RZA), after the events of the first film, decides his soul is uneasy as a vigilante warrior. He begins a journey to return to his beloved temple, strengthen his chi (inner strength) and unite his mind and body. Along the way, he is beset by old enemies who refuse to buy his assertion that he is now a man of peace. While Thaddeus thwarts his attackers, he is rendered unconscious and sent adrift in a river. He lands in a small mining village, ruled by the evil Beetle Clan; a gang of cutthroat bullies led by Master Ho, played by Carl Ng and Lord Pi, played by Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa, who allows those who disagree with him the opportunity to fight in what appears to be the original octagon of the UFC. The people of the village are mere cannon fodder for the Beetle Clan, but one family, Li Kung, played by Dustin Nguyen and his wife Ah Ni, played by Eugenia Yuan, are secretly members of the Praying Mantis Clan. Why they are in hiding, or why the Praying Mantis fighters are reluctant to reveal themselves to the Beetle Clan is never really explained. I guess if there are too many Beetles and Praying Mantises, the members of the Orkin Clan will appear. Thaddeus doesn't want to become involved in the village's conflict, but obviously, circumstances will dictate that he takes a side and fights for honor and friends.
RZA desperately wants to promote himself as a martial arts star, but frankly he was the weak link in the first film and his sole fighting expertise is pummeling thugs with his iron fists, complete with a multitude of spraying blood packets. The fight scenes in THE MAN WITH THE IRON FISTS 2 are okay, but there is nothing stellar, and certainly nothing that compares with what Jason Statham and Tony Jaa are doing in FURIOUS 7.
Despite enticing cinematography by Roel Reine and several scenic shots from the Thailand locations, THE MAN WITH THE IRON FISTS 2 is an average view. It seems RZA is planning more films to highlight Thaddeus' journey back to the temple. Until he reaches his destination, he'll walk the Earth, helping people, like Caine in Kung-Fu. Let's hope his next adventure has better fight choreography and a handful of grade A list stars to help the endeavor.
Aftermath (2013)
Thriller with nifty visuals
I remember avoiding films with Anthony Michael Hall in them when I was growing up. He starred in teenage coming of age flicks at a time when I was leaving those silly teen years behind. Thankfully, things and time have changed. He now stars in AFTERMATH, a thriller that will be remembered for its unique presentation.
Dear reader, please allow a little techno-babble at the beginning of this review, rather than the customary conclusion. Director of Photography Scott Beardslee incorporates rather unique camera angles in AFTERMATH. They are not kosher and generally off-skew. As a rule, this is not good, but, with this film it works. It suggests something is not quite right with the unfolding of the plot and the actions of the characters. It's similar to the 1960's BATMAN TV series, where the villains were always shot with a cant camera angle; though these shots are more subtle, and not as blatant. Beardslee also utilizes reverse framing; placing principle characters in the wrong portion of the shot to provide further feelings in the viewer that something is terribly amiss.
Couple this cinematography with un-regimented graphics and a tie-in to a graphic novel between scene changes and AFTERMATH has a unique visual presentation which helps its story immeasurably.
Anthony Michael Hall is Tom Fiorini. He is a construction company owner, very successful and very wealthy. When he first appears on screen, he is in quite the dilemma. Flashbacks reveal the incidents and circumstances on how the opening scene eventuates and we meet a plethora of sketchy characters along the way. There is Tony, played by Chris Penn. This is Penn's last film performance. He was found dead while the movie was still in post-production. He's a framer for houses, a former convict and general BA with an attitude problem. He butts heads, literally with Matt, played by Jamie Harold who is the construction foreman. When their confrontation escalates, Tom is dragged into the fracas which soon snowballs into avalanche proportions. Along the way, Tom's wife, played by Elizabeth Rohm and a justice seeking sheriff, played by Leo Burmester (who incidentally died one year after post-production was complete), and local gangster King, played by Tony Danza, will be dragged onto the battlefield.
Director Thomas Farone ends the film, but then explains the ending by inserting additional clips during the end credits. This is a rather clever ploy because not staying until the end of the credits means the entire mystery will not be revealed. As a bona-fide film critic, I always make it a point to stay until the end credits roll. I become a bit testy when folk leave beforehand, or worse, stand up in front of me and beginning talking, blocking my view of the screen. I know some of the folk in Tinseltown, and I like to see their names. With this maneuver, Farone forces the movie balers to sit through the credits or risk not knowing the who or why of the murders. Nice.
As thrillers go, AFTERMATH is an average tale. It was originally shot in 2006, and after a few re-shoots, was placed on a shelf in distribution hell. It's one of a growing number of films that never opened in Pittsburgh; however, it is currently available on home video and VOD. If you're looking for a quirky, but very watchable murder mystery, this one should fit your bill of fare. It is added by solid performances by the cast, and a bit of creative trickery behind the camera.
Woman in Gold (2015)
Crucial film, so history does not repeat.
WOMAN IN GOLD Ultimately, WOMAN IN GOLD is a film about the struggle of the little man against an overwhelming, ruling power. It is the antithesis of the adage "you can't fight city hall". These stories always play well with viewers, and WOMAN IN GOLD should not prove the exception to the rule. It is, after all, a story which needs to remain in our psyche, especially in times like these when an incompetent president and his administration and lackeys seem intent on history repeating.
THE WOMAN IN GOLD is the story of Maria Altmann, played by Helen Mirren. She was a member of a prestigious family in Austria, before the invasion of the Nazis. Her home and family were destroyed and valuable art treasures stolen from their home. Now, as Austria recognizes its compliance in history with the Nazi movement, the government opts to hear cases for restitution for those WWII victims. Altmann wants her family's paintings returned, especially one of her aunt, with whom she shared a special friendship. Like most governments, however, Austria is not willing to release the paintings, claiming they are now the country's property and part of its historic culture. Faced with the prospect of challenging an entire government, coupled with museum curators and corrupt politicians, Altmann enlists the aide of her friend's son, Randol Schoenberg, played by Ryan Reynolds.
It's quite easy to mock and jeer at Reynolds. Movie-goers hold him responsible for THE GREEN LANTERN, a better than average superhero film that somehow captured the ridicule of comic geeks. The same group is already condemning his turn as Deadpool in an upcoming X-Men adventure. Reynolds is suffering the same fate Matthew McConaughey and Ben Affleck suffered years back. Now, both are holding Oscars and McConaughey is driving a Lincoln and being parodied by Jim Carrey.
Reynolds is fine in this film. He plays well off of Mirren. The story is, in essence, a tale of his coming of age in relation to his heritage. Like many Millennials, Schoenberg thinks the world began with his birthday. It takes a trip to Austria for him to discover the importance and significance of his birthright.
WOMAN IN GOLD drags at times, making it seem longer than its actual length. Some scenes are repetitious. Surprisingly, others are stilted. This occurs due to remedial dialogue, penned by Alexi Kaye Campbell. Luckily, Reynolds and Mirren are quality actors and able to salvage the scenes.
The past six years produced a paradigm shift in culturally accepted indignation. As the Obama Regime consistently turns its back on Israel and promotes anti-Semitism, Holocaust themed tomes are deemed trivial; an obsession by those forever living in the past. Meanwhile, films on slavery and black oppression are elevated to royal status, with private screenings in the White House mandated. America's first black president, second if you believe Bill Clinton, made race relations prominent and the Holocaust insignificant. Look at the films released in the last six years as evidence.
Still, at a time when several Middle East countries and militias are stating their mission to eradicate Israel from the globe and further seek the destruction of America, for it is in their eyes, the Great Satan, the lessons of the Holocaust must not be forgotten. Films like WOMAN IN GOLD should help keep the memories alive. History is repeating itself. Muslim leaders are spewing the same rhetoric as Hitler once did, and our current leadership is all too willing to support them. It is akin to Roosevelt and Churchill siding with the Nazis.
WOMAN IN GOLD could have more of an impact, with better seamless transitions between segments and stronger scripting; however, the film is salvaged by the power of its stars and their ability to elevate mediocre material. The film is crucial to see for a reminder of what happened in the past and the ability to have the jurisprudence not to let it happen again today.
The Dark Knight Rises (2012)
DARK KNIGHT could be best picture of year.
THE DARK KNIGHT RISES is an excellent movie; superior script, strong characterizations, solid cinematography and augmenting action. It's just not a particularly strong Batman movie.
Chris Nolan is a celluloid genius. He has managed to appease practically everyone in his Batman swan song. He needed to satisfy cast and crew, he needed to wrap his trilogy up in a convincing, yet final manner, and he needed to ensure the relative calm of the comic fans and more fanatical fan boys. He has accomplished all three.
First, there's the saga of star Christian Bale and the Batman suit. Bale has a problem with claustrophobia, and the Batman suite has caused him fits throughout the trilogy. In THE DARK KNIGHT RISES, which runs nearly three hours, he is actually in the costume about 20 minutes. That's good for Bale, but not so good for Batman fans.
Series regulars return as well, including Michael Caine and Gary Oldman. They both offer outstanding performances, but Caine's is exceptional. It very well could garner him a nomination for Best Supporting Actor.
Nolan said repeatedly THE DARK KNIGHT RISES was his last oeuvre with the character and the series. He brings the story to a definitive end, but leaves a door open for anyone foolish enough to try to follow his act. Bale also said he would quit when Nolan did. This allows Nolan to write in a darker Batman element. Ever since Frank Miller's Batman tome "Batman: The Dark Knight Returns", many fan boys wanted to see an edgier Caped Crusader on film. Knowing Bale was bailing, Nolan scripts a battered and bruised hero, silent in Gotham for eight years and demonstrating the injuries and traumas of a life of fighting crime. This should appease the Miller devotees. While the legend of Batman may continue, it will definitely not be in the guise of Bale.
While Bane, played by Tom Hardy, is credited in the comics with breaking Batman's back and putting him out of commission, the character was weak; a runt with an attitude, juiced up on a super serum called venom, to monstrous proportions. Nolan has completely reinvented Bane, for the better. He is a mercenary, quick and strong with ties to the League of Shadows and Batman's arch nemesis Ra's Al-Ghul.
Several other comic and fan boy elements are brought to closure as well. Did Jim Gordon know Batman's identity? Did Batman and Catwoman have a tumultuous love affair? And, what about Talia, daughter of Ra's Al Ghul? All of these questions, long debated in print form, are brought to closure in THE DARK KNIGHT RISES.
There's a political undertone that is alarming in THE DARK KNIGHT RISES. Hardy as Bane and Anne Hathaway as Selina Kyle, preach the true Communist manifesto as they plot a rebellion against Gotham, designed to take from the wealthy and give to everyone else. Their speeches sound as if they were purloined from the ranting of President Barrack Hussein Obama and others of his ilk. "No one got were they're at alone." "If you built a successful business, you didn't do it on your own. Someone helped you." These troubling Communist mantras fill today's headlines promoting envy and jealousy in the social classes, and they are even more troubling when spewed by Bane and not a slickster in a suit on Pennsylvania Avenue.
The world Bane creates with his rebellion is not the land flowing with milk and honey that was promised; just as Obama's platitudes sound utopian, but will surely turn America into a socialist third world nation. Perhaps this is Nolan's way of suggesting everyone vote in November to ensure Obama is limited to one term, as we, unfortunately, do not have a Dark Knight to bail us out. One can only hope the message is received.
The scenes shot in Pittsburgh are a distraction. The first time you see the film, be prepared to have a selection of goobers scream and yell every time a familiar landmark or local personality flashes on screen. Some folks just don't go out too often. The recognition factor also hinders the augmenting action sequences. Nolan orchestrates the action scenes like a conductor creating a full crescendo. While the tension is building, a familiar spot pops on screen and the brain switches into recognition mode, momentarily halting the crescendo.
THE TRILOGY Nolan wraps up all loose ends in THE DARK KNIGHT RISES. What started as one man's search for the meaning of his life ends with the discovery of what he sought.
So, with the stars, cast and crew happy, the producers happy, the comic and fan boys happy, Nolan has scored the natural hat trick. He bows from the trilogy with a complete, stand alone tale, much like Bryan Singer did with The X-Men, though this story is quite a bit darker.
I originally gave BATMAN BEGINS an 8/10 rating. THE DARK KNIGHT, which I still think is one of the best films ever made, I gave a 15/10. THE DARK KNIGHT RISES easily earns a 10/10 and as such is the winner of the coveted Fist of Fiore Award for 2012. This means it is the epitome of film as entertainment. Three movies, with an overall rating of 33/30, I'd say Nolan has made his mark and it is one that surely will not be challenged for quite some time.
But while it accomplishes all these things and does so in style, it's not what one expects from a Batman movie. Our hero is tarnished, worn out, his life destroyed, his fortune lost and his friends and family alienated. He has no option but to pass the torch. It's an uncomfortable way to end a Batman story.
THE RATING FOR THE DARK KNIGHT RISES = A -30-
Savages (2012)
Stone slips on SAVAGES, salvages style
SAVAGES
Oliver Stone's films are complicated and often difficult to digest. I brought several guests to the press screening of his latest film SAVAGES and afterwords asked them what they thought. Both said they were still thinking about it. Something happened, but it's not the immediate gratifying sensation generally provided by most films. I do know this, I'm glad I saw the film, but the only reason I might watch it again is to see Salma Hayek. She is an amazing woman who seems to be more seductive and exotic as she matures. In SAVAGES, she is manic, bouncing from ruthless drug lord to pathetic parent in the blink of an eye. It's the type of performance that could garner Best Supporting Actress nods.
So, as I digest Stone's SAVAGES over my morning cup of Joe, allow me to share a few observations. First, like many Stone works, SAVAGES is too long. Clocking in at 2 hours and 15 minutes, this tale could easily be contained in 90 minutes. Blame Editors Joe Hutshing, Stuart Levy and Alex Marquez for dragging the tale out and causing lulling gaps in the sequencing.
On the other hand, Cinematographer Dan Mindel made me feel quite at home. He incorporates shots and SFX techniques, like graining, posterization, racking focus and sepia, which were part and parcel of shooting in the 70's and 80's. The style did nothing for the tale, though the shots did help the slow parts, but they did bring back fond memories of my camera wielding days. Mindel's close ups of Benicio Del Toro, as Lado, are also very effective in presenting him as a psycho, demented nefarious no-good.
The subtle messages Stone delivers, as he always does, are conflicting. He establishes the Mexican culture as superior to American culture. This is evidenced in Elana's (Hayek) first discussion with O, played by Blake Lively. Her contempt for O's whining is apparent, though O is channeling the air-headed mantras of the Net Generation.
Sexual mores are called into question. The Mexicans, though the antagonists as murderers, rapists and drug smugglers present an almost Puritanical view on sexual relations. They may murder and rape, but they immediately bless themselves and pray for forgiveness afterwords. Meanwhile, the Americans are presented as a Hugh Hefner hedonistic sexual miscarriage. Here again, the Mexican culture is utilized to lambaste the liberal tomes.
Finally, seeing the two cultures clash in this fashion, Stone imparts a searing warning to close our borders and prevent America's invasion by Mexicans, whether legal or illegal. While the folks in Arizona, Texas, New Mexico, Nevada and California may all agree with this sentiment, apparently the Supreme Court doesn't.
KEY SCENES TO LOOK FOR: 1. THE FIRST ROBBERY 2. THE FIRST ATTACK 3. THE FLARE SEQUENCE
The final message Stone delivers with authority is a version of Woody Harrelson's "nut up or shut up". Taylor Kitsch and Aaron Johnson play Chon and Ben respectively, two polar opposites who are best friends. They enter the drug business when their college dreams of success fall though. Ben is the pacifist, Chon the aggressor. Repeatedly in the film, Stone delivers the message that following the pacifist way leads to destruction and death, while the more prudent and ultimately safer method, would always be Chon's. Imagine if Chon's team would have executed their plan during the first hotel meeting. The result would have been a totally different story, maybe the script for Expendables 3.
Salma is Elana , a Mexican drug lord fallen on hard times. She is under attack by a strong competitor, her operation is crippled by DEA agents who seem to have inside info into her procedures and she cannot produce the quality product Ben and Chon do. As a result, she decides to take over their production method and distribution routes in a most aggressive manner.
Stone can either be complete genius (Natural Born Killers) or boring soap box preacher (JFK). With SAVAGES, he is nestled in mid-ground. An absolutely insipid monologue by O in the film's final reel, trivializes all that precedes it. It's one sequence that should have been cut to avoid the WTF comments as the credits roll. SAVAGES is worth a look for the camera-work and for Salma, but unless you're a hardcore Stone fan, the price of admission may be too high for this one. Sounds like VOD or DVD rental is a much better avenue.
THE RATING FOR SAVAGES = C
-30-
Fiore Mastracci is Pittsburgh's longest running film critic and has been secretly in love with Salma Hayek since a press conference held in 1990.
The Amazing Spider-Man (2012)
The epitome of excellence in film entertainment
Famous writers, and some not so famous, will look at their works and immediately begin to rework and rewrite them. It is in their nature. Something can always be refined, always made more concise. Editors share a similar foible. This is the case with the latest incarnation of comic book fav, Spider-Man. THE AMAZING SPIDER MAN is a much better telling of the web head's tale; a tighter script, a more eristic tale, and a more involved and inspired cast. THE AMAZING SPIDER MAN is two and a half hours in length, but as I watched the advanced press screening, I was totally unaware of the passage of time; certainly an indication of a well-made film. This version of Spidey is definitely worth the price of admission and repeated viewings. It is one you will be able to watch numerous times and still cull entertainment from; a definite addition to your home video collection. As such, it wins the coveted Fist of Fiore Award for 2012, exemplifying excellence in film entertainment.
Sometimes what is new is old again. Most of the superhero reboots return to a truer, if grizzlier version of the original comic tale. THE AMAZING SPIDER MAN returns Peter Parker to high school, rather than college. Encountering Professor Cur Connors is therefore a bit of a story bend. The connection between Peter's parents and Sgt. Nick Fury's S.H.I.E.L.D. organization is hinted at, opening doors for Spidey to cameo or co-star with either the X-Men or, more likely, The Avengers. Peter/Spidey is played by Andrew Garfield. He offers a passionate, modern approach to the character, but, again, this is his first outing. Tobey McGuire was solid in his first appearance as the Web-head, too. It wasn't until the sequels his contempt for the part was demonstrated.
Emma Stone, sporting a coiffure of blonde tresses, is Gwen Stacey, Peter's first true love. Emma is more than another glitz of glamour on the Silver Screen. She also displays amazing acting prowess and a precocious understanding of the camera lens. In THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN, she is a scene stealer.
Also in the cast are Rhys Ifans as Dr. Connors and Denis Leary as Captain George Stacey. Ifans is adequate in the role but his relationship with Peter is stilted; not from the acting, but rather a lull in the script. The original tales tell of a deep friendship between Connors and Peter, but Screenwriter James Vanderbilt doesn't reveal the rudiments of the friendship, save for an intellectual appreciation on the introductory level. Leary, on the other hand, is reduced to an extended cameo part. He is able, however, to portray Captain Stacey as a knowingly perceptive policeman and loving father. Finally, there is the Hitchcockian cameo by Stan Lee as the high school librarian, played in a collision montage for laughs.
THE AMAZING SPIDER MAN has a few drawbacks. One major issue is the appearance of The Lizard. In the comics, The Lizard had large protruding jaws jammed with razor sharp teeth. In this incantation, there are no jaws, just a distorted scaly face. It's not as menacing. This version of The Lizard is also cleaver and calculating. I seem to remember when Connors transformed into The Lizard, he became savage and rather mindless. (If my memory is faulty, I'm sure the comic book fans will forward emails to point out the error of my aging recollections.) The rest of The Lizard is excellently done by Production Designer J. Michael Riva. It somewhat compensates for the lack of jaws.
The other issue is one that plagues most superheroes. It's the egotistic desire of the lead actors to rip off the mask. In the last trilogy, Tobey McGuire made it a requirement. He was delusional enough to think his fans wanted to see him and not the superhero in full costume. Garfield is taking the same approach. Every major character in this story knows Parker is Spidey by the film's end. It makes the entire concept of a secret identity rather moot. The only sequence where the mask removal is viable and in character is when Spidey saves Jack, the little boy on the bridge.
KEY SCENES TO LOOK FOR: 1. ON THE ROOFTOP WITH GWEN AFTER DINNER 2. THE SCHOOL BATTLE WITH LIZARD 3. FIRST ENCOUNTER ON THE BRIDGE 4. THE IMAX WEB TRAVELLING SCENES 5. THE JACKIE CHAN STYLE SUBWAY FIASCO
I had the opportunity to see THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN in 3d IMAX. It's definitely worth it. The sequences of Spidey swinging through Manhattan are quite entertaining and effectively shot. Cinematographer John Schwartzman utilizes camera angles exceptionally well to compensate for any flaws in CGI. And, I would be remiss if I didn't mention the Armstrong family. For years I have made it a point to highlight when Vic Armstrong is involved with a film. The iconic 1980's stuntman is now passing the torch as the entire Armstrong family is engaged in fight sequencing and stunts for this film. Daddy Vic serves as second unit director.
THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN has a conclusion, but leaves so many doors open Columbia Studios can really take this saga in any number of directions. There is the now obligatory added scene after the credits, so be sure to stay to the very end. All told, though, THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN is a most noble reboot of the franchise, a great movie, and, at the risk of angering comic fanboys everywhere, a lot better than THE AVENGERS.
THE RATING FOR THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN = A
-30-
Fiore Mastracci is host and producer of the award-winning Outtakes, soon to celebrate 500 shows. Click and like the official Outtakes Facebook page at: www.facebook.com/OuttakeswithFiore
Ted (2012)
Chock full of laughs
Not since last year's THE FAMILY TREE has a comedy kept me laughing from beginning to end. TED does just that. I laughed loud and hard during Seth MacFarlane's directorial debut. TED is far and away the funniest movie I've seen this year. It's nasty, irreverent, unexpected and laugh out loud funny.
MacFarlane is best known for his impertinent, sometimes sacrilegious animated "Family Guy" cartoon series. He utilizes the same approach in TED. MacFarlane leaves no one or no topic unskewered. Jews, gays, Boston girls, drug users, grocer store managers, car rental businesses, liberals, conservatives, Christians, Indians, Muslims (especially Muslims), all feel Seth's wrath. A criticism against MacFarlane is his penchant for over playing the liberal and gay agenda. His characterization of Stewie on "Family Guy" was receiving extremely poor reactions from the fan base and an alteration, though subtle, was instituted. MacFarlane's tone and attitude have mellowed slightly and more conservative mores are appearing in his scripts. Maybe this is because he's older and wiser, and maybe it's because he's been hanging around with talk radio host Rush Limbaugh. Who knows? The bottom line is the comedy is an equal opportunity laugh fest. The nefarious doper-slacker comedians can and should learn well from MacFarlane; you can make a funny movie with more than three bathroom humor gags repeated for 90 minutes.
John Bennett, played by Mark Wahlberg, is the kid no one likes. The opening sequence sets his pathetic scenario during the annual beating of the neighborhood Jewish kid at Christmas time. Wahlberg is solid in this role. After a series of yo-yo like performances in action flicks, he dives into this part with relish. I've been rather critical of Marky Mark of late, but he's climbed up the ladder of impressiveness with his performance in TED.
Mila Kunis is Lori Collins, John's girlfriend. She is rather nondescript in the part, but with her exotic looks, all she really has to do is make love to the camera with her deep swimming pool eyes. Of course, MacFarlane knows this well and doesn't waste time in mocking her appearance in the guise of sleaze ball boss Rex, played by Joel McHale ("you have that smoky, Baltic something look
?") In addition to an extended cameo by McHale, Ryan Reynolds, Sam Jones and the rest of the voice cast from "Family Guy" all appear in TED. The only one missing is Jennifer Tilly. It's a shame; she would have fit nicely into this flick.
MacFarlane is the voice for TED. Admittedly, there are times when he sounds too much like Peter Griffith, but most of the time the laughs compensate. The effects for TED are top notch. Credit Production Designer Stephen Lineweaver and Special Effects Supervisor Adam Bellao and his crew for bringing a teddy bear to life. It's a solid blend of puppetry and animation.
KEY SCENES TO LOOK FOR: 1. THE HOTEL FIGHT SCENE 2. MEETING SAM JONES (FLASH) 3. NORA JONE'S DRESSING ROOM
There are numerous one-liners in TED. Like the old Peter Sellers comedies, they are so plentiful you will miss many of them while you are laughing at the initial one. This is a good thing, because it will enable you to pick up something new through repeated viewings.
If I have one complaint, it's probably the pervasive drug use. It's the only running gag McFarland overplays. Perhaps if dopers weren't causing so much havoc in schools, in neighborhoods and on roadways they would be more amusing. Now, however, they are just wretched.
Still, the concept of a young boys wish for his teddy bear to be real presents a plethora of mirth-provoking plights, and MacFarlane pokes most of them. As narrator Patrick Stewart says: "There is nothing on Earth more powerful than a little boy's wish on Christmas Eve, except the Apache helicopter..."
THE RATING FOR TED = B
Magic Mike (2012)
Worth leaving the theatre and demanding a refund.
Occasionally, I find myself sitting in a press screening and questioning my sanity for submitting myself to celluloid torture. The movie I'm watching is horrendously bad I begin counting the seconds of my life I'm losing. Mind you, this does not happen often. Generally, my sense of duty and humanity towards my countless fans, and you are legion, keeps me in my seat until the final frame has passed through the lens. Alas, such is not the case with MAGIC MIKE. After sitting through the movie's first hour, I simply could not take any more. I realized nothing could possibly happen in the film's remaining reels that could justify the preceding crud. The acting was terrible, the story trite and the characters totally unsympathetic and the endeavor offers no redeeming values. The more I watched MAGIC MIKE, the more I could feel my IQ dropping. It was worse than watching HGTV. Not surprisingly, I walked out of MAGIC MIKE. It's truly that god awful.
MAGIC MIKE is supposed to be a comedy about male strippers. The concept certainly has potential. What I witnessed in the first hour was an example of Chinese Cinema at its worst. With few exceptions, Chinese producers make movies without scripts, just rough outlines. What the producers of MAGIC MIKE have are a few cheesy dance routines. As an excuse for putting these routines on the Silver Screen and hijacking your hard earned entertainment dollars, Scriptwriter Reid Carolin surrounds the routines with a banal tale. There is a plot, but its so clichéd and mundane it could easily be housed in a 30 minute TV show. Even the most feeble minded viewer can see the plot points several reels in advance. The characters are not cardboard, they are Paper Mache. If you thought the characters in BATTLESHIP were superficial, MAGIC MIKE makes them appear Oscar caliber. Carolin should be placed in the equivalent of time out for writers until he has completed 90 days indulgence.
The funniest element of the film is watching Kevin Nash, a near 60- year old pro wrestler, pose as a stripper. Nash's knees are shot from years of abuse bouncing off ropes and leaping from turnbuckles. Compassionately, he is relegated to the back line of the stripper troupe. His routines are inconsequential and often don't match what the other dancers are doing on stage. It's excruciatingly apparent he's struggling with anything but the simplest of movements.
Mathew McConaughey, plays Dallas, the owner and operator of the male stripper troupe. He made a public statement, just days before this film's release, that he was turning a new leaf in his personal life. He stated he would be more mature, and act more adult. Perhaps the statement was his personal mea culpa for this movie.
Channing Tatum, who was actually breaking free from his customary tin man performances, throws his entire career back to square one with an absolutely horrid presentation. If he acted any more disenchanted with this role, the producers would have paid him not to be in the movie.
I can't believe Director Steven Soderbergh opted to helm this bile. He is capable of much finer work.
I imagine there will be some who find MAGIC MIKE appealing; probably sexually frustrated adult women and gay men. There is always someone who will like something regardless of how tasteless it is. For this, I award you no points and may God have mercy on your souls. I walked out on MAGIC MIKE. It is truly excrement on celluloid and everyone associated with this endeavor would be well advised not to put it on their resumes. Avoid this one as you would herpes
THE RATING FOR MAGIC MIKE = F
Snow White and the Huntsman (2012)
Thor meets Eddie Valiant in the woods
SNOW WHITE AND THE HUNTSMAN There have been battles in the past of same theme movies. There were dual Bonds, dual space invaders, and dual Earth crushing asteroids. Each time, there has been a clear cut winner. In this spring's battle of Snow Whites, SNOW WHITE AND THE HUNTSMAN is far superior to MIRROR,MIRROR, making it the New Age interpretation of the fairy tale. But, that title may be won by default simply because MIRROR, MIRROR was too eclectic.
SNOW WHITE AND THE HUNTSMAN is methodical. Editor Conrad Buff IV, who has THE LAST AIRBENDER, SHOOTER AND TRUE LIES to his credit, tries to pace this film as best he can, but the script ties his hands. I am happy he added the IV to the end of his name. He didn't use it in his other films, and frankly I was getting a bit confused between him and Conrad Buff III. First time screenwriter Evan Daugherty demonstrates his inexperience in movie scripting by penning staccato segments. Previously, he penned short films and the transition to full length movies is not yet a comfortable one. Time to have coffee with Syd Field. Likewise, first time Director Rupert Sanders is uncertain how whip up everything into a free ride, so audiences must sit through "actionus interruptus" far too many times. Greig Fraser, who offered amazing cinematography in LET ME IN, is the best technician here. His shot angles and sequencing assist when the others falter.
The actors help. Chris Hemsworth is the Huntsman, and basically playing Thor in Robin Hood garb. At least once, they should have handed him a hammer. It would have been worth the laugh. As it is, he swings a large axe through most of the picture. Kristen Stewart is Snow White. There are actually a few scenes where she exhibit some acting talent lurking behind her doe eyes. Charlize Theron is devilishly delicious as Queen Ravenna, though she spends so much time in hag make up, one must wonder what that mirror on the wall sees in her. Finally, in a move sure to anger the Midget Actors Guild (MAG), full grown stars are inserted into the roles of the seven dwarfs. They include: Nick Frost, Bob Hoskins, Ian McShane, Eddie Marsan and Ray Winstone. The CG effects are good, but at times it's too obvious other actors are standing on risers.
Sometimes, it's a hindrance to be in the film review game for so long. (I can't believe I actually wrote that) It's rare a film can offer sequences that are not purloined from a previous endeavor. For example: in SNOW WHITE AND THE HUNTSMAN, Queen Ravenna utilizes the finger and palm technique to destroy an enemy's heart. This is taken directly from INDIANA JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF DOOM. One could almost hear "Kalimahl" being uttered in the background. When Bob Hoskins declares: "Do you see? She is the one!", it hearkens back to Laurence Fishburn stating the same thing to Carrie Anne Moss in THE MATRIX. Queen Ravenna surrounds herself with black ravens, working a spell of magic that is reminiscent of Christian Bale's Batman using black bats to make an escape from a surrounded building in BATMAN BEGINS. She sucks the youth from her victims in much the same manner as Anna Silk in LOST GIRL. And, there is the scene of Snow White visiting the God of the Forest that is stolen almost verbatim from PRINCESS MONONOKE. The only difference is green fairies replacing the Kadama. The fairies are cute; the Kadama are better.
All told, SNOW WHITE AND THE HUNTSMAN is not a bad view. It shows some promise for the folks making their feature length debuts and even a glimmer of hope for Stewart in the acting department. The movie just takes itself too seriously at times, when it shouldn't.
THE RATING FOR SNOW WHITE AND THE HUNTSMAN = C -30-
Get the Gringo (2012)
Gibson great in GET THE GRINGO
It is quite fashionable to ridicule Mel Gibson. His alleged drunken profanity infused rants placed the fine folks in LaLa Land in total attack mode. Understand, Gibson was a Hollywood darling before he bucked the studio system with his independent distribution of PASSION OF THE Christ. The major studios all refused to handle the film due to its subject matter, but Gibson was undaunted. He was certain he had a product the American public wanted to see. He refused to be swayed when the power-brokers in Tinseltown said no, and released the film through an independent distribution deal. Studio heads cringed as THE PASSION OF THE Christ broke box office records and became a financial hit. No one in Tinseltown likes it when someone succeeds outside of their parameters. Gibson's move made him number one on the wanted list for demonstrating a box office hit could be accomplished without Hollywood backing. It's no coincidence Gibson's bad press proliferated after he beat the system. Hollywood, like a woman, does not like to be scorned. Lost in the media smear campaign is the simple fact that Gibson has been the motivating force behind some of Hollywood's biggest movies. As a director, he's taken more chances in film production than most full-time directors. Now, in spite of the powers out to destroy him, Gibson may have scored yet another victory by circumventing the Hollywood system once again. The movie was originally titled HOW I SPENT MY SUMMER VACATION. By the time post-production was completed, the name changed to GET THE GRINGO. It's a better title. Gibson conjured a premium deal through Video on Demand (VOD) to release the movie. GET THE GRINGO premiered exclusively on DirecTV for the month of May. Beginning this week, and continuing through the summer months, it will be available on all VOD services. When the VOD run is complete, GET THE GRINGO will be released on Blu-Ray and DVD home video. Gibson also released the film through the theatrical circuit, but only overseas. Once again, he supplanted the domestic Hollywood machine.
"We're just in a different era," Gibson said in a recent interview. "Many people just like to see things in their homes. It's just another way to do it and a better way to do it. I think it's the future." Gibson could be right, as major studios recently have been forced to entice people into the movie houses by using technical ploys. So, distribution stratagems aside, what about GET THE GRINGO? Some years back, Gibson shocked the box office with a film dubbed PAYBACK. It was Gibson, out of his element, playing a nefarious no-good seeking retribution from those who robbed him. The original version of the film was so brutal, the studio demanded it be reedited and toned down. The theatrical release is still quite gritty, though it does have a more viewer friendly ending. In GET THE GRINGO, Gibson is back in the same mold and persona that made PAYBACK a hit. Gibson not only stars in the film, but he also fronted the money and co-wrote the script with Director Adrian Grumberg. It concerns a mysterious driver who escapes to Mexico with a large amount of cash. His desires for freedom south of the border are rather short-lived as the Mexican police believe they should posses the ill-gotten loot, and quickly toss the driver into an infamous Mexican prison. While in prison, the driver befriends a young boy who is being protected by a crime syndicate boss for organ harvesting. He becomes entangled in the lives of the boy's family and soon realizes the only safe avenue for all of them involves escaping from the prison and eliminating their antagonists. Starring with Gibson are Daniel Gimenez Cacho, Jesus Ochoa, Roberto Sosa, Dolores Heredia, Kevin Hernandez, Fernando Becerril, Mayra Serbullo, Mario Zaragoza, Gerardo Taracena, Tenoch Huerta and Peter Gerety. GET THE GRINGO is a lot of fun. This is probably Gibson's best character since PAYBACK. He's slick, deadly and seemingly one step ahead of everyone else in the game. Editor Steven Rosenblum paces the film well, entwining plot points between action sequences. Director of Photography Benoit Debie gives the movie a 1980's action film look that is nostalgic and effective. Antonio Pinto's score is a spicy salsa, complete with Spanish guitars. It sounds very much like the music of Incendio. As the summer of super heroes continues, any action film, regardless of quality, will be lost in capes and spandex. Just look at the box office returns for Jason Statham's SAFE. So Gibson, brandishing his rebellious side once again, opted to skip the studio route and premiered GET THE GRINGO through VOD. It was a bold and creative move. While the first month exclusive for DirecTV severely limited the audience, the gambit may prove successful when other VOD services have the film beginning June 1. Don't let this one slip by you. I liked this movie a lot. It's worth the price of VOD, or a video rental. Gibson is great and certainly in his milieu. I think you'll like it, too.
THE RATING FOR GET THE GRINGO = B
The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (2011)
British ensemble cast shine
THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL I must admit I have a weak spot in my heart for British light drama films. They seem to combine just the right amounts of pathos and laughter to carry a story. Admittedly, as I advance in years, I'm more prone to appreciate the ensemble casts British filmmakers tend to utilize. When you place John Madden at the helm, you have a winning combination. Madden became the darling of English departments across the nation with his SKAKESPEARE IN LOVE, and presented an engaging thriller of aging spies in last year's THE DEBT. Now, he fronts THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL, and it's a marvelous anecdote for anyone in or nearing their senior years.
There's currently an urban legend making the internet rounds about an old man who is a greeter at Wal-Mart. He does his job exceptionally well, but often comes to work late, sometimes by as much as 15 minutes! The store manager, a young fellow fresh from school says to the old man: "You do a marvelous job when you are here. You are, in fact, our best greeter. But, I have to write you up because you have this problem arriving late to work. What did they say to you when you were younger and came late to work?" The old man looks at the young manager and says: "They said 'Good morning, Admiral. How would you like your coffee?'" I relate the story because it is the basis for THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL. Seven seniors find themselves kicked to the curbside in modern day British society and attempt to rediscover some type of usefulness in an advertised luxury resort in India. The luxury resort, however, is not all the brochure and advertisements promised.
After thirty years of public service, Douglas (Bill Nighy) and Jean (Penelope Wilton) were hoping for a comfortable retirement. However, after Douglas fronted his daughter their retirement money to launch an internet business, the only flat they can afford is far below Jean's standards. She blames Douglas for not ushering her into the lap of luxury to which she feels she is entitled.
Evelyn (Judi Dench) is a recent widow. With her husband gone, she realizes she has never led a life of her own. Without her husband, she is lost and has no idea how to live, until she discovers the wonders of the internet. She finds a kindred spirit in Douglas, much to Jean's chagrin.
Madge (Celia Imre) is staying in a lovely home with her son and his family. Unfortunately, she is constantly pressed into service as a baby sitter for her grandchildren. THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL offers her a chance at living her own life, so she takes it. Similarly, Norman (Ronald Pickup) is a widower with a college boy libido. He is instantly drawn to Madge, but it is apparent to both, they are not going to blend. Instead, they help each other in their quest for happiness.
The British have always enjoyed a cultural empathy with India. While some view the history of the two countries as imperialistic, others are cognizant of the metamorphosis the two cultures experienced, both to the betterment. Muriel falls into the former category. She despises Indians and their country and is not at all pleased with the cultural blending that has occurred. Through her adventures at the hotel, she will learn, despite traditions, people basically have the same dreams and desires, as is modus operandi for scripts of this nature.
Finally, there is Graham; a superior court judge, he was born and raised in India and found his one true love there. Now, after 40 years, he is returning to confront his past.
All of the vignettes, and the characters they embody, are tossed together in THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL. The hotel is not the best of salad bowls. It is run by Sonny (Dev Patel), who inherited it from his father. Sonny is the youngest of three brothers and has yet to make his mark on the family. He is madly in love with Sunaina (Tena Desae), but she is from a different territory and social status, eliciting the ire of Sonny's mother. If he can just make the hotel work, perhaps he can appear as successful as his brothers and win his mother's favor. Unfortunately, the hotel is nearly as decrepit as its residents.
To tell this tale, Madden pulled several key crew members from THE DEBT, including writer Ol Parker and cinematographer Ben Davis. He complimented them with Editor Chris Gill, who is best known for his work on the zombie flicks 28 DAYS LATER and 28 WEEKS LATER, and musical scorer Thomas Newman, who wrote the melodies for two FIST OF FIORE AWARD WINNERS, American BEAUTY and THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION.
Thrown into the main plot is a subplot, jabbing firmly at Indian telemarketers. If only these folks were as keen as Evelyn would have them be, and not chained to those ridiculous 12 minute scripts.
THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL will not track well with younger audiences. There is no bathroom humor and while sex is hinted at, no one really wants to see a geriatric sex scene (that line probably upset Alex Baldwin immensely). The film should track well in Pittsburgh. The city's population is ever aging, and young, wealthy conservatives making money opt not to live here where the tax structure is socialist in nature. For anyone who has hit and passed 45, THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL will provide an enjoyable, humorous drama, without the brainless entertainment values the Net Generation craves each and every weekend.
THE RATING FOR THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL = B
Battleship (2012)
Summer popcorn movie at its best
BATTLESHIP I have high anxiety with movies based on games; not only video games, mind you, but board games, too. Remember the fiasco, CLUE? This is why, at the screening for BATTLESHIP, I turned to my guest and said: "If someone says, 'you sank my battleship' in this movie, I'm going to steal your popcorn." I didn't steal the popcorn. Director Peter Berg was not that corny.
Back in the day (which Dane Cook tells us was a Wednesday), BATTLESHIP was dubbed a strategy game. In actuality, it was more a hit and miss peg game, but the more perplexing problem in translation to film is how to make a plastic barrier screen into a viable movie plot point. The answer: Aliens (Steven Spielberg knew it all along). From this point, BATTLESHIP borrows from a plethora of other movies to weave the best "let's kick their butts" military propaganda since BATTLE: LOS ANGELES.
Alex Hopper, played by Taylor Kitsch, is a social misfit. No matter what he tries, he manages to screw up. Think Bill Murray on steroids. His brother Stone, played by Alexander Skarsgard, is a successful naval officer, who cares deeply for his younger sibling and is taking the role of surrogate father. Alex falls madly in love with Samantha Shane, eye-candy in the guise of Brooklyn Decker. Sam however, is the daughter of Admiral Shane, played by Liam Neeson, who is general lord and commander of the navy. Also appearing, in complete battle fatigues is pop diva Rihanna as Cora 'Weps' Raikes. Through the entire film she is wrapped head to toe in military garb, drenched in combat sweat, yet she still manages to look hot. It's an abnormality; she has no bust line, her derrière is too large, she's covered with inane tattoos making her look like a AAA triptik, yet somehow there is something alluring about her. Go figure.
Fed up with his incompetence, Stone drags Alex into the navy with him; a type of brotherly drafting. Here is the first of many script continuity errors. Alex comes into the navy as a second lieutenant. How? There's no mention of a college ROTC program, nor a passage of time as Alex rises through the ranks. Apparently, you can just go down to the local naval office, sign up as an officer, and be placed in charge of the weapons department on a destroyer. Sweet. Screenwriters Erich and Jon Hoeber leave important elements, such as this, completely out of the story in favor of skimming over the minimal plot to bring the viewer to the battle scenes. For this type of movie, it's a very good move. The love story was beginning to reek of Nicholas Sparks's fumes.
From this point, a hodgepodge of scene stealing encompasses the rest of the movie. Geek scientists send a message into space to other potentially life-bearing planets and receive a response, just like JOHN CARPENTER'S SPACEMAN. The response, however, is not one of peace and love. The aliens send a strategic scouting party for invasion, ala INDEPENDENCE DAY. Instead of Jeff Goldblum saying "Checkmate", we have David Jensen saying: "We're looking at a class four extinction level." Personally, I didn't know extinction came in levels. I always thought it was an either-or proposition.
Conveniently, the assembled navies of 14 different countries happen to be on maneuvers in the exact spot where the aliens decide to land. Once in the Pacific Ocean, the aliens establish a protective bubble, taken directly from the original and far superior, WAR OF THE WORLDS. Borrowed from the same film is a key scene regarding the alien eye piece; the difference is one of insect and reptilian lenses. Some ships are trapped inside the bubble, while the rest of the military is outside, with no communications possible. The few ships trapped inside must find a way to hold off the alien hordes and lower the force field, just like Han and the gang in RETURN OF THE JEDI.
The SFX crew takes over, led by Production Designer Neil Spisak, and the roller coaster ride begins. Ship vs. ship, man vs. alien, man vs. man, man vs. ship and myriad David and Goliath encounters fill the screen in break-neck pace, thanks to Editors Colby Parker, Jr., Billy Rich and Paul Robell. Steve Jablonsky adds a rousing score that is liberally purloined from TRANSFORMERS and INCEPTION. The aliens are the most humanoid seen on film in recent years. Hands like ET, helmets like PREDATOR, and body armor like BATTLE: LOS ANGELES, several of Hollywood's top make-up artists appear as alien invaders in cameo roles.
BATTLESHIP follows the same formula as 80 percent of John Wayne's war movies. It's a tried and true pattern, just as successful now as it was during the 1940's. To beef up the tale, Berg tosses in a SPACE COWBOYS element for the final climatic conflict. The ship, screeching to an impossible port maneuver, and the references to Sun Tzu's THE ART OF WAR, are hysterical.
There are neither deeply evolving characters nor substantial story telling. BATTLESHIP sets up the fight, and then lets the festivities begin. This is a summer movie at its finest. Bring out the popcorn and enjoy.
The Avengers (2012)
Alien Invasion thwarted by battling Super Heroes
THE AVENGERS So, what's not to like? THE AVENGERS promised to be the biggest movie of the year, that is, until the release of THE DARK NIGHT RISES. It is. Mix four of the world's greatest superheroes with three of the world's best spies and assassins and pit them against an invading army from outer space, with some of the best SFX guys in the business, and how could you not have the popcorn movie of the year? This begs the question: How can mere mortals fight along side superheroes? The three in question are Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson), Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) and Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson). Director and writer Joss Whedon does a fine job incorporating these characters with those who have powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal men.
Is there great acting? No. Doesn't have to be; none of the characters calls for it. Robert Downey, Jr. can do the wise-ass Tony Stark in his sleep. Mark Ruffalo does a credible job filling in for Edward Norton, but I keep thinking how much better Norton's sneer would have been as Bruce Banner. (Original reports issued from the Hollywood PR machine claimed Norton was holding out for too much money and really didn't want the role. After the spin died, my sources revealed Norton very much wanted to be in the film and reprise his role as The Hulk. The studio cut him out and put out a smear campaign against him, making him persona non grata. Rumors are Downey was afraid of being upstaged, but I find that hard to believe as Downey and Norton have both painted the town red, with aplomb, in the past.) Is there a superior story? No. The invading army coming through the time warp portal is too reminiscent of MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE. I half expected to see Frank Langella riding one of the space carriages as Skeletor. The mechanical dragons harken back to the god-awful Hercules films, starring Lou Ferrigno (the original Hulk). And, there are enough continuity errors to scratch your head and cause you to anticipate the extended DVD version, which will certainly plug up the holes with deleted scenes.
And, we couldn't have a Hollywood movie without putting a bit of an agenda, now, could we? Even the epitome of American Exceptionalism, Captain America, cites Americans as losers and avers the Stars and Stripes are tarnished. This is an obvious ploy to cater to the anti-American crowd that so loved the comic issue where Captain America lost his faith. It isn't necessary in this movie, and it adds a sub-plot that is never resolved. Thankfully, Nick Fury tells Cap: "we need to believe in those things again". Amen, brother. Amen.
The stars of films like THE AVENGERS are the techs. They do a masterful job that is the sweetest of eye-candies. The film is shot in 3D and IMAX. It doesn't need it. There's no amazing 3D sequence, like there is in WRATH OF THE TITANS; so my advice is save a few bucks and see the movie in a regular theatre with standard projectors.
Is it big? Yes. Is it fun? Yes. Especially the scene where Loki tries to explain to the Hulk he is a god. Is it a great night out? Absolutely. Is it the film of the summer? Ah, no. I still think that will be THE DARK KNIGHT RISES.
THE RATING FOR THE AVENGERS = A -30-
The Raven (2012)
Nifty blend of fact and fiction
THE RAVEN
Once upon a midday dreary, as I left the theatre, apprehensive and weary
(this was necessary because I was at the Pittsburgh Waterfront; a once blighted area that then Mayor Tom Murphy thought could be rejuvenated if the taxpayers fitted the bill for building new stores and restaurants. Now it's an area with new stores and restaurants that you must exit by 10pm for your own personal safety. Muggings, rapes and shootings are the order of the Waterfront, once darkness rules and the profiled minorities come out to play.)
having just seen the tale of THE RAVEN, a thriller, portrayed as of yore.
As I nodded, nearly ecstatic with appreciation, suddenly there came a tapping, as of someone gentling rapping, rapping on a Red One Camera, HD multi-lens, for a look that often parallels Tim Burton's crisp metallic grey aura.
Eagerly I sought to borrow, memories of creative camera angles in photoplay storytelling. Vainly, those angles, created by Cinematographer Danny Ruhlmann, sought to borrow from this viewing, surcease of sorrow; sorrow for the mundane, humdrum camera work that so dominates today's fare. It succeeded, as the stately THE RAVEN has a creative and engaging look, majestic as it sits upon the pallid bust of Pallas
Ah, distinctly I remember the rousing score of Lucas Vidal; especially the end credits sequence which rivals anything produced by Danny Elfman. And each dying ember of celluloid, so masterfully spliced by Editor Niven Howie, to create a rare and radiant beauty called THE RAVEN, nameless here, evermore.
Enough of this droll hacking of Poe's classic! On with the review!
It is 1867, the final days of Edgar Allan Poe, and a deranged serial killer, for motives unknown, is using Poe's tales as inspiration for a series of gruesome killings. Inspector Fields, a watered down American version of Sherlock Holmes, fronts the investigation, but is at wits end until he approaches Poe himself, to serve as consultant in the case. Poe is played well by John Cusack, an Outtakes favorite. Yet even Cusack's normally dominating screen presence is overshadowed by Luke Evans' portrayal of Fields. His characterization often reduces Cusack's Poe to supporting actor. A nifty bit of shooting enables Fields to exit the story and allow Poe to take center stage for the dramatic climax.
Along with Cusack and Evans are Alice Eve, as Poe's love interest, Emily Hamilton, and Brendan Gleeson as her father. Through the course of the film, Emily will live through snippets of "Masque of the Red Death", "Cask of Amontillado" "Premature Burial" and "The Tell-Tale Heart". Good stuff. Tossed in for good measure are "Pit and the Pendulum" and "Murders of the Rue Morgue" along with poems "Eureka", "Annabelle Lee" and "The Raven".
I, personally enjoy when characters of historical note are inserted with fictitious characters or alternative realities. For this reason, I am an avid fan of author Max Allan Collins, especially his Nathan Heller novels. THE RAVEN shows like one of those novels - quite entertaining, a macabre blending of fact and fiction, and a most enjoyable evening out.
THE RATING FOR THE RAVEN = B
The Five-Year Engagement (2012)
Mundane romantic comedy that crawls for over two hours
THE FIVE YEAR ENGAGEMENT It's bad enough when Hollywood opts to produce another inane romantic comedy, but to further torture viewers by dragging the monotonous gag for over two hours is cruel and unusual punishment. Like most films of this ilk, the potential for ground-breaking comedy is always there lurking beneath the surface, but it never emerges from its briny depths. Once you slip past the line: "You were sending telepathic wiener missiles to her face!", the movie serves no other purpose than to provide an evening of swamp ass.
THE FIVE YEAR ENGAGEMENT stars Jason Segel, Emily Blunt, Chris Pratt, Alison Brie and Rhys Ifans. The film is rated R, but if you're hoping to see a bit of Blunt's ample assets, forget it. The only nudity is this R-rated sex romp is Segel's ass. Did not make my night.
Segel is Tom Solomon, who is madly, desperately in love with Blunt's Violet Barnes. He proposes and they begin wedding plans. In the interim, Violet is offered her dream position in Michigan, while Tom is climbing the cooking ladder of success, serving as a top chef in San Francisco. The comedy arises when the two love-birds opt to wait for the ideal moment to tie the knot. The message is clear: There is no ideal moment; you must pretend you're Nike and "just do it". So Violet's sister Suzie (Brie) hooks up with Tom's best friend Alex (Pratt), and they raise a family while the love-birds still wait for the perfect moment. Enter Ifans as Professor Winton Childs, who manages to move on and seduce Violet. College professors and satyrs, fostering the stereotype like soup and sandwich. Meanwhile, the perfect time still hasn't arrived. Pretty standard script fare for this type of film.
No romantic comedy since "Romancing the Stone" has required creative technical aspects. THE FIVE YEAR ENGAGEMENT will break no grounds. All the technical crew is putting in yeoman's duty, offering basic fare.
While most of these movies offer a "true love conquers all" motif, the social commentary often bulges through the comedy's pace. So it is with THE FIVE YEAR ENGAGEMENT. Had Producer Judd Apatow and Director Nicholas Stoller stuck to comedy and tossed the social commentary, they would have had a funny 70 minute movie. But, then, that's not really Apatow's style, is it? And while we're on the topic of social commentary, only a woman mired in the ranting of the H3L could comprehend the message Segel pens into the script. This message basically says as long as your love for someone is true, it is of no consequence how many folks you romp with before you settle down with that someone special. Say what? Men think differently.
Segel is Hollywood clever. He dons multiple hats for his films. In THE FIVE YEAR ENGAGEMENT he not only stars, but writes the screenplay and produces as well. This is a solid way of collecting multiple paychecks for a single endeavor. But, Segel's comedy is hit and miss. He was masterful with the "Man or Muppet" segment, but is merely mundane here.
THE RATING FOR THE FIVE YEAR ENGAGEMENT = D
-30-