- I tried to be responsible in teaching kids things I thought were good lessons, all in the context of, 'it's okay to be wild and have a good time.'
- Amazingly, by way of a mutual friend of his son Christian, I learned that even Marlon Brando thought Pee-wee was a real person! He couldn't believe I was an actor who had created that persona-which is maybe the highest benediction.
- Had we gone to trial, we had ready an expert from the Masters and Johnson Institute who was going to testify that in 30 years of research on masturbation the institute had never found one person who masturbated with his or her non-dominant hand. I'm right-handed, and the police report said I was jerking off with my left hand. That would have been the end of the case right there, proof it couldn't have been me.
- The moment that I realized my name was going to be said in the same sentence as children and sex, that's really intense. That's something I knew from that very moment, whatever happens past that point, something's out there in the air that is really bad.
- Look at me, I'm getting defensive about something that happened so many years ago, somebody said. I'll have to find out who that was and if he's still alive.
- I think my entire career path was determined for me when I was 6 years old, watching reruns of 'I Love Lucy' on television and thinking about making people laugh.
- The public already knows about me more than I ever wanted it to know.
- I would love to be in Kansas.
- I was Pee-wee Herman for so many years that it wasn't really a question that I didn't want to do other things.
- I probably have become more infamous from two misdemeanors than probably anyone I could think of.
- But I don't know. Pee-wee just kind of popped out one day, pretty much fully fleshed-out and fully formed.
- I've always felt like a kid, and I still feel like a kid, and I've never had any problem tapping into my childhood, and my kid side.
- The public may think I'm weird. They may think I'm crazy or anything that anyone wants to think about me. That's all fine. As long as one of the things you're not thinking about me is that I'm a pedophile. Because that's not true.
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